its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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