No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize
