I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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