More tranny stories later!
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
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