i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
he's gonorrhea incarnate
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
