Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
