the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Randomize
