I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
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