problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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