I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Randomize
