can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Damn victory sex feels great
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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