Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

i already hear my dad disowning me

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(443): View more from Maryland

dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...

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(937): View more from Ohio

There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.

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(314): View more from Missouri

It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.

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(516): View more from New York

Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?

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(601): View more from Mississippi

Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.

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(614): View more from Ohio

Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?

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(480): View more from Arizona

the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..

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