you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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