hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
