I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
