he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
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