I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
