His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Randomize
