Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
