Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
