I got chris browned last night
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
