we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
Green mimosas i think yes
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Randomize
