i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
She bit a glass in half.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Randomize
