I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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