My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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