I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize