She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
