Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
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