Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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