my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
