her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Never joke about your clitoris.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
