when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
A+ Viking dick
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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