never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
