I got chris browned last night
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
