Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
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