Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Randomize
