id be glad to
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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