That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
