my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
