Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
