Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize
