Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Randomize
