is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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