One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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