I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I have feelings that need drinking.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
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