Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
