That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
