we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
being pregnant is like rehab
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Randomize
