roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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