It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Randomize
